How does this apply to fathering? A father who allows children to bargain their way out of receiving justice is overthrowing his ‘land’ or ‘house.’
In what ways do children often offer “bribes?”
- I’ll never do it again – repeated indefinitely. Emotional bribery
- Threats or assertions that the child won’t/doesn’t love the parent because of discipline. Emotional bribery: offering affirmation of love in exchange for getting its own way.
- Threatening or throwing tantrums. Emotional / Psychological bribery: I won’t embarrass you if you do what I want.
Proverbs 29: 15 Rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to itself / abandoned shames his mother.
The implications here are significant:
- Children are not good self-raisers.
- They are not naturally good and will not turn out fine if left to themselves.
- The NASB’s “a child who gets his own way” suggests parental disengagement or pacification. This relates to Prov. 29:4. Regardless of the way or reason for leaving a child unshaped by the rod and reproof, the result is parental shame.
- If you are not using rod and reproof on your children, you are abandoning them to your own shame. Caveat: "the rod" in the hand of a loving parent is a tool for restorative discipline; in the hand of an angry parent, it easily becomes a tool of injustice and cruelty.